The Meat and Potatoes of Fantasy Sports

In case you haven't been following along over the last two days, I've been outlining how to be commissioner for your fantasy league. This series of best practices has spanned - gathering league members, setting up the league structure, setting the rules and draft and even some tips on keepers. To see the earlier posts, click here. This post will address trading and troublemakers, but first, we'll talk about my *personal touch*.

I like to draft about two weeks prior to the first day of the season. I find this to be an optimal trade-off between leaving enough time to properly thieve people preseason, but not too long that significant preseason injuries become a concern. During that first week after the draft, I like to issue what I call 'The Introductions'. Introductions is where you take a short time out to write up a small blurb about each owner in your league. Nothing long, nothing in depth, and packed with jokes, Introductions are a good way to build a community amongst the owners. Don't say anything really personal, like where a guy lives, but instead give his name, his team name, and then something funny like 'Joe is famous for drafting Michael Jordan in the first round of fantasy basketball......back in 2003'. To have a successful league you need everyone to feel comfortable talking and ragging on each other, your introductions are the perfect way to kick this off. Here's an example from my last set of introductions (his team name is first, then his name, then a name I made up for him):

PoopyDiapers - Mike XXXXXX - aka Monique: Hard to tell what's bigger, Mike's skill or the circumference of his arse. Two things Mike does superb, he drafts like a New England Patriots scout, and he devours a bucket of fried chicken like a young southern girl with no date to the prom. Mike's career started seven years ago and he's got two championship rings under his belt. Smart money says he finishes top three, while managing his new baby's poopy diapers.

I've opened the door for my league here on two accounts, I've told them to make fun of this kid for being large and for being a new dad. Instantly he gets labeled in the league, and people are much more comfortable dropping the ole trash talk because they know exactly where to hit him, they're more comfortable. Community and camaraderie is key, and introductions will get your league started off on the right foot.

Now onto trading. I probably should've said this back during the league setup, but it was too important to lump in. When you set the rules on trading, you must select that teams may not vote on trades, and the ultimate and only decision comes from you, as commissioner. Then, explicitly tell your whole league, no trade will ever be vetoed EXCEPT in the instance where collusion is involved. Collusion is not permitted and you will be banned from the league if you collude.

Trades should never be vetoed. First and foremost it's unrealistic. If trades were veto-able in the NFL, the Pats wouldn't have gotten Randy Moss. If they were veto-able in the NBA, the Lakers wouldn't have gotten Gasol or Artest. The whole notion of a veto is a bad idea. Never veto any trades period. So long as there is no collusion going on (trust me, collusion is VERY obvious), then (in my opinion) the more one owner Trade Rapes another, the better. That's playing the game!

Should you ever decide to veto a trade 'in the name of league fairness, because one team would be too good after the deal', you're going to open up a floodgate that will make your life hell. For every single subsequent trade you'll have at least one league member demanding you veto it, and using your past veto as precedent. Let them all through, every single trade goes through. If you did a good job recruiting members, you'll have no worries following this advice.

Sometime during your career as a manager, you will deal with both - two managers colluding on a trade and - a ridiculously lopsided deal, a 'too' lopsided deal. In the case of the first one, you have to use your judgement. If there is any way you can proceed without using the veto, do it. If it's a collusive trade, but neither owner still has a realistic shot at winning, just let it go. I can't urge you enough, try to never use that veto button, it's just a whole world of trouble waiting for you. But, if it's absolutely necessary, this is the only instance to ever veto a trade. EVER. Still, no matter which route you chose (veto or no veto) those managers are banned from your league going forward. Zero tolerance. This is a situation you will deal with once, and proper handling will send a message to everyone else that you do not tolerate collusion, and it won't ever happen again.

You will also preside over a ridiculously lopsided trade. I'm talking along the lines of Lebron for Eric Gordon type lopsided. It will happen. Guess what, when it does, you're going to let it go through. Be sure you investigate and make certain there was no collusion, make 100% certain, and then let it go through. Then again, at the end of the season, let the guy who traded AWAY Lebron know, he's no longer allowed to play. He is not 'up to the level of competition'. Move on, find a new manager, nuff said. Remember, that veto button is your worst enemy. Keep your rules transparent and consistent and your league members will respect you greatly.

Ahh, this post went on longer than I expected. These were important things so I'm glad to have gotten them across. We'll continue tomorrow where I'll go over troublemaker managers and tell you the story of the guy who dropped his entire team to the FA wire in one of my leagues!