Sunday, December 27, 2009

The Fantasy Thief - Secret Sauce Calculator version 1.0

Time to take your game to the next level! The Secret Sauce Calculator is a must have tool for any serious fantasy sports player. Version 1.0 is built for use in the 2009 - 2010 NBA season, Version 2.0 for use in Fantasy Baseball will be released in early 2010.

What does Secret Sauce mean?
As an avid player of fantasy sports for over a decade, I was able to go back through all the historical data I've maintained on winning seasons. From this data I have calculated out what a Fantasy Team needs to AVERAGE PER GAME in each of the major stat categories, in order to finish TOP 3 for that category. Thus my 'secret sauce' says your entire fantasy team needs to average 17.44 points or more to finish TOP 3 for that category (in Roto, in H2H the Sauce should ensure you win that category for the week).

Can't I Just Look at The Categories I am Losing In?
SURE! If you draft a team, and never make any add/drops or trades, you could just see which Stat Categories you are losing and try to focus on them. However in the Real world of Fantasy Sports, your team changes almost weekly. You might've been losing the Blocks category, but you just added two shot blockers to your team, was this enough? Was it too much? Only the Sauce knows!

How Do You Know What My Team's Averages Are?
It's one thing for me to tell you the Secret Sauce numbers, but it doesn't much help unless we know what your team's Average Per Game stats are. In the past, readers would use current year per game averages for each player on their team, and take the average of those numbers (confused yet?). Now all you need is this spreadsheet. Simply enter in each player on your teams name in the spaces provided, and my special formula pumps out each players Secret Sauce numbers, and your entire teams secret sauce numbers. This new and improved method takes into account years played (both rookies/sophs and old declining veterans), injuries, positions and even league size!

Yeah, So How Does That Raise My Game To The Next Level?
Well, the Secret Sauce Calculator then compares your teams Sauce numbers with my historical league Sauce numbers needed to finish top 3 in each category, and then highlights which areas your team is Strong, which it is Weak, and which are Neutral. Following the example above, if The Sauce says your entire team needs to average 17.44 points per game, and the Sauce Calculator says your team currently is expected to average 16.33 points per game this season, you need to add a scorer to your squad. Likewise if it says you need 6.5 Rebounds per Game, and you average 7 Rebounds per game, then you now know to trade a Rebounder for a Scorer.

Now stop and think about that for a second. In EVERY category, you're going to know EXACTLY how strong or weak your team REALLY is. No more guessing. And you'll know EXACTLY who to trade for, no more guessing. Thinking of swapping Caron Butler for Paul Pierce, but not sure if that will help your squad? Merely open the calculator, sub out Butler for Pierce and see how the move affects your sauce! Epic stuff!

OK! So How Do I Get A Hold Of This Calculator?
Funny you should ask. Well seeing that I'm offering this awesome product FREE OF CHARGE , and seeing that this is a blog, and seeing that Blogs work on subscriptions (which are FREE too), I will imbed instructions in the bottom of this and future blog posts which can only be seen by actual Subscribers. Once you see the information, you will know how to download the spreadsheet, which merely requires MS Excel to open (let me know if you don't have MS Excel and I'll tell you other options).

Every Monday I'll be updating the data in the Spreadsheet to make sure we have current season numbers. So you're going to want to keep your eyes open for the updates, and make sure you get it.

AWESOME I'm Not Telling ANY Of My Friends About This!!
Look I hear ya, you got something good and don't wanna share it. In most cases that makes sense, but not this one. You see, if everyone in your league knows their sauce numbers (knows where they are weak, where they are strong) then they're MORE likely to make trades. More trading = more fun. If you've paid close attention to this blog so far, you'll realize that knowing your sauce is one thing, but making the right moves with it is entirely something else. So please, spread the word. But also, PLEASE, don't just give away the download info, make sure they subscribe to the blog themselves. I'd like to keep this stuff free, and I haven't made a dime on the work I've already put in.

Wow This Is GREAT! Will You Have More Stuff In The Future?!
As a matter of fact I will. I'll have the exact same spreadsheet set up for Fantasy Baseball, which I will roll out sometime in late January. This will be a VERY KEY TOOL FOR USE IN DRAFTING. It will help ensure you have the right types of hitters in your lineup, and the right mix of starters and closers. ALSO, I'll be rolling out in the next week or so, the BUY LOW SELL HIGH INDICATOR. This is another spreadsheet program that allows you to enter in a players name and it will run through my special formula, and pump back either BUY LOW, SELL HIGH, or HOLD. Yeah, cause I'm sick like that.

Alright, I'm rolling it out a bit early. Hit me up if there's any bugs and I'll fix them. All you need to remember is LASTNAME,FIRSTNAME there is no space between the comma and the first name. Enjoy playas!

AGAIN I HAVE IMBEDDED INSTRUCTIONS IN THE BOTTOM OF THIS AND FUTURE BLOG POSTS THAT CAN ONLY BE SEEN BY SUBSCRIBERS!!

74 comments:

  1. hey thief, I'm pretty sure I subscribed, how do I find out if I did or not and if I didnt how do I?

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  2. Hahaha! Do you receive the posts via email? If so, then you've subscribed!

    To be honest, I'm sitting here crossing my fingers that this all works the way I'm planning it to

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  3. haha, i registered this blog to the google reader..i dont know if im doing it right lol..

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  4. enzo, lady thief has it hooked up to google reader too. We're waiting for it to come through to see if this all works. If it does, beautiful. If not, I'll fix the issue immediately.

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  5. Hey thief, I dunno if I'm subscribed already. I just post my comments on your blogs and logged in using my Google Account. Is that enough?

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  6. i'm a follower and signed in to my account, I'm not sure if that is what you meant by subscribing.

    I can see the thing on the side which says enter password - subscribers only but I can't find the password yet.

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  7. password will be imbedded in the email version of this post - ya dig?

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  8. Heya thief, If I'm a follower of this blog, am I going to receive the email version of this post?

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  9. i also added it to google, when i clicked on the subscribe posts via email on the side

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  10. Thanks thief, i already saw the password haha..

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  11. you should, if not theres a bunch of ways to set that up, including a link that says SUBSCRIBE BY EMAIL in blue, below this comment box

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  12. oh ok in the email version sounds good, i just added that to my google thing so I'll wait and see if I get an e-mail eventually

    And on an unrelated note what do you think of trading kevin love for Paul pierce

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  13. wow, my team sucks.
    these are my sauce numbers, i still have 2 spare slots in my team, so i need your help guys haha..

    PPG 16.49228512
    RPG 5.971339557
    APG 3.377519819
    SPG 1.043641361
    TO's 0.495380085
    3PG 0.727156095
    BPG 0.76861991
    ORPG 1.603984047
    DRPG 4.367355509

    i have
    deron
    udrih
    lou williams
    k.martin
    jeff green
    josh smith
    joakim noah
    al jeff
    amare
    rose
    cj watson (expendable hehe)
    joel przybilla (expendable hehe)
    kevin martin

    our leage has a max of 2 adds per week so i wasnt able to drop vanilla gorilla.

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  14. Im trying to figure out how to get the password if i get this right i write here then get an email with the password embedded, right?

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  15. nm sorry got it just wait for the email

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  16. Thief, I just saw some problem to yout calcu. Aldridge is not in there. I tried aldridge,lamarcus but got no numbers. Thanks thief!

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  17. i got it, looks excellent, thanks a lot thief

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  18. @Norgene its Lamarcu, i saw it on the raw data, typo i guess..

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  19. Just based on their numbers alone, at this points is A. Bynum and/or D. West worth keeping?

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  20. Thanks a lot, thief. I'm having some problems w/ Russell Westbrook though. His stats just won't come up.

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  21. @edemauro try westbrook,russel

    Guys, if the stats dont come up just click the Raw Data below and search the name of the player.

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  22. great job thief!!!!

    speights,marreese
    Villanueva,Charlie

    both not working

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  23. yeah like enzo says, use the master list of names, long names get cut off

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  24. Sup thief, so I used the subscribe method and added to google and myyahoo. should i be getting an email or am i missing something. Thanks man, Im excited. Thank the lady thief for hooking up google reader.

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  25. Thief i get the email but no theres no password. Did I do something wrong?

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  26. neel, for some people, for some reason, it takes longer for the post to go out. not sure why, its a google thing i guess.

    Baller, its at the very bottom of every email (you might have missed it)

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  27. so thief im getting the comments but not the email whats up?

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  28. I subscribed last night with my AIM account and I am a follower. Should I have gotten or will I get an email? I'm anxiously waiting to see this masterpiece...

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  29. it's coming playas. I promise, the post emails get delayed sometimes. But I'll send out another post at 10pm EST to make sure the new people who might've missed the last post get the password tonight

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  30. so thief im getting the comments but not the POSTS* whats up?

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  31. Thanks thief thought the password was supposed to be embedded in the comment blog emails..my bad ill wait for the email tonight

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  32. thanks thief, this tool is really great! kinda depressing now that i realize my team sucks, lol

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  33. this is excellent, and amazing

    would I be correct in saying that larger rosters, as well as larger leagues will have slightly lower sauce numbers because they have to pull out weaker players to fill up their last few spots?

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  34. Thief, I haven't used my AIM account in a while. Like 7 years, so I had to update my email. Can you try sending it to me?
    P.S. I sent out that trade Richardson for Frye/Stuckey. Still hoping he bites.

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  35. Thief,

    This thing is off the hook! I added the link to your site to my league page and people are already ranting and raving about it! (Also, I donated a few dollars to you via your "donate" button...well worth it!) this is almost as good as the granger deal you helped me pull off!
    Can't wait for the baseball spreadsheet!

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  36. hey thief i have no idea what email my account is linked to. But i cant see the embedded link
    Can you email it to me. Thompson.1580@osu.edu

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  37. If you get a chance, can you email me the secret password?
    Pouch26@yahoo.com

    YOU RULE!

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  38. I'll throw up another post in about 30 minutes, so the password will go out again. Be sure you're set up right!

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  39. Alright, I got it. My numbers aren't that bad. Just need to up assists mostly.

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  40. do i bench rasual butler tonight?? im down .002 FG% and he has tony allen to play.

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  41. 10 team h2h

    trade my j rich thaddeus brook lopez
    for
    joe johnson and mo williams and horford

    PG: Chris Paul, Devin Harris, Jose Calderon
    PG/SG: Lou Williams
    SG: OJ Mayo
    SG/SF: Jason Richardson
    SF/PF: Josh Smith, Rudy Gay, Thaddeus Young
    PF/C:Brook Lopez, Andrea Barnagni, Joakim Noah, Luis Scola

    any opinions/suggestions on team??

    sauce:
    threes .82
    points 16.18
    bounds 6.02
    dimes 3.58
    steals 1.17
    blocks .77

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  42. I would, Tonys not a great shooter

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  43. hey theif out of all of these who would you rather have?

    speights, dejuan blair, hansborough, jerrid bayless, watson, jared jeffries, or ersan ilyasova

    sure its kind of marginal, but in any case please explain your answer. thanks a lot (maybe rank them?)

    p.s. thanks so much for the spreadsheet

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  44. Seems like some numbers are off. It said Deron Williams is averaging 14 points and 7 assists.

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  45. kobe, GREAT CATCH!! I'll fix that bug right now, should take but five minutes. Thanks SO MUCH

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  46. Lou Williams is also averaging rediculously low numbers as well

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  47. Hey thief, am getting all the comments through email but not the post or the embedded file.. How do I fix this?

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  48. okay thief,

    i entered the password but nothing happened. it said i got it right then nothin.help?

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  49. I fixed the apreadsheet, you just need to download it again. Thanks for the catch, it was only for the last 30 names Alphabetically. I'm going to put up a new post now, so everyone will get the email.

    Carlo, a new website should open up. You might have some popup blocker on or somethin

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  50. how do i enter lamarcus aldridge for it to work?

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  51. Pavel, use the player list on the raw data tab, for players with long names, part of it got cut off

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  52. I'm getting every email under the sun, but I don't see any password. Am I doing something wrong?

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  53. umm i dont have ms excel wat do i do

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  54. not getting a password either can you just tell us the pass plz

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  55. great job on the tool. looks like alot of time was put into it. thanks thief!

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  56. 10 team h2h

    what up thief. hope the holiday was good. what u thinkin about this trade???

    trade my j rich calderon brook lopez
    for
    joe johnson and mo williams and horford

    PG: Chris Paul, Devin Harris, Jose Calderon
    PG/SG: Lou Williams
    SG: OJ Mayo
    SG/SF: Jason Richardson
    SF/PF: Josh Smith, Rudy Gay, Thaddeus Young
    PF/C:Brook Lopez, Andrea Barnagni, Joakim Noah, Luis Scola

    any opinions/suggestions on team??

    sauce:
    threes .82
    points 16.18
    bounds 6.02
    dimes 3.58
    steals 1.17
    blocks .77

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  57. Hey thief,

    I got the password and am ready to roll! Thanks to you and lady thief too ;-) Question, will you consider Sweet Lou a good buy low? I'm just a bit under in ast and was thinking to offer Frye since I am good in 3's (Peja is one of my bench players). Thanks for the advice buddy.

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  58. Gerry, yeah Lou can help there for sure. But he only averages about four dimes when hot.

    Mamba, I'm not clear what you'd be gaining?

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  59. ...sup!! k, so now how to get this calc.!?

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  60. i would gain threes, dimes, and points. i wouldnt even lose fg %. only thing i lose a bit of is blocks. plus i get the headache of calderon off my team. but i really do like brook aand j rich.

    u dont think i should pull the trigger?

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  61. It's the horford for lopez switch that irks me, will he do without?

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  62. i dont belive so. he actually only wants brook to ship him off to someone else for a good guard. but i mean, horford is still 1.4 blocks, plus i have josh smith. he rebounds more. the only thing is scoring, witch mo and joe make up for. its a tough call!

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  63. That's just it, it's very close. Thief don't like close deals unless they r absolutely necessary.

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  64. ...this must be posted heaps of times!? k, i'm recieving my post by email now (correct?) but no way finding this password...? ?

    help plz.

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  65. thanks thief, i got the password.. i'll try to get ben gordon.. ^^

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