Alert! Two Time Sensitive Buy Lows!

Merry Christmas Eve thief nation, hope you're all home enjoying this fine holiday week. Me? Doing what I always do, stayin on top of the Fantasy Sports world to keep you in the loop. I don't rest on this stuff, I love it too much. Doc Rivers doesn't rest on it either, nor Phil Jackson, nor Bill Belicheck, this is what it takes to bring home championships. I texted a guy in my league today, told him I was putting Salmons and Jackson on the block cause I have treys to spare. His reply was 'stop looking at your fantasy squad, it's Christmas Eve!'. Yeah, thanks, go f*ck yaself bro, I'm in it to win it. On to the post!

I sending out a TIME SENSITIVE buy low here on two studs. Remember my post from earlier this week regarding the difference between being hurt and being injured, well we got word today that two top notch stars are definitely hurt. I did some background research into this to make sure they were just hurt, which I'm gonna show you. Hopefully you can go forth and use this information to swindle some manager who thinks they are injured, as opposed to just hurt, and snag each on the cheapy cheap.

Paul Pierce is first up. Pierce started off the season on fire, posting a sick FG% through November and early December. I rang the SELL SELL SELL bell on him as we knew the FG% was coming down, and indeed it did. Well the time to BUY BUY BUY is upon us. Released today was news that Pierce will miss the next two weeks due to an infection in his knee. From the report:

***Pierce was in so much pain from a right knee infection that the all-star forward called team trainer Ed Lacerte on Wednesday around 3 a.m, coach Doc Rivers said. Lacerte went to Pierce's house and took him to the hospital, where they drained fluid from Pierce's knee.

Pierce didn't make the flight to Orlando for the Christmas Day game against the Magic. He is expected to miss at least two weeks.

"What he's going through is pretty significant," Celtics guard Ray Allen said. "It is serious. Because me knowing Paul, he's always practising and he's always playing, so for him not to be here, it must be very significant."***

Sound scary? GOOD, go send it to the owner of Pierce too, scare the ever livin crap out of him. It's an infection, nothing more nothing less. They caught it, they'll treat it, he'll be fine. No breaks, no tears, no strains, just an infection. He'll be out two weeks give or take, and he'll come back being himself again. I'm offering Stephen Jackson and John Salmons for him.

Next up is Brandon Roy. Roy hasn't lived up to par thus far in the season, but par for him is a pretty high friggin bar and his owners aren't necessarily disappointed. Roy has a 20, 5, 5, type of game which is fantasy gold. In his last game he suffered a sprained shoulder and left the game. Sprained shoulder, sounds bad, especially when they list his timetable as 'day to day' and they say 'will run tests'. You know what a sprained shoulder is? It happens when you fall down and your arm is outstretched. You know what they tell you to do to avoid getting one? Don't play sports. QB's get this all the time, it takes about two to three days to heal up and then you're back out there. Nothing big. Again I offered Stephen Jackson and John Salmons for Roy. I figure a sprained shoulder sounds worse, maybe he panics. It's Christmas Eve, he's getting a little tipsy, sees the trade come in through his phone and...........yeah, that's all I want for Christmas, Pierce and Roy on the cheapy cheap.

Go hook it up playa, straight thievin!